I love explaining what “girl math” is to my friends who gamble because they seem to think that I’m the financially irresponsible one. In reality, their hobby costs them more than girl math ever could, and is quite frankly, unattractive.
The science behind girl math is focused on the change in one’s bank account. Things purchased with money from returns, gift cards, and cash payments can all be thought of as “free” because no money is withdrawn from the bank account. If I purchase a coffee in cash, it’s technically free because my bank account’s balance is unchanged. Similarly, if I receive a refund for an item, technically, I gained money because the number in my bank account went up.
The genius of girl math, however, is in luxury purchases. Let’s take a hypothetical example: Say I purchased a designer purse for $200 dollars. If I use that purse 200 times, it would cost me $1 for each use. It is undeniable that paying just $1 to use a $200 designer purse is an absolute steal.
Now here’s where the magic happens: Say I use this purse 201 times. Since I technically have already paid for this purse, not only is it now free, but I’m actually saving money every time I use it. So, in reality, I would be a lunatic to walk away from buying this purse — and some would say I’m losing money by not doing so, because the return on investment on a designer purse doesn’t get better than this.
Gambling has no long-term ROI, no matter how good the odds are or how much money you can make off of them. Some of my friends gamble occasionally, and don’t see a problem because “anything is fine in moderation.” But it’s not exactly like my broke college friends walk out unaffected after placing a losing bet. They walk out telling themselves that they’ll “win the next one,” and when they do, they go back and gamble again — and lose. It’s not a lucrative form of income, no matter how much it pretends to be. Not to mention that spiral mentality is what turns occasional gambling into an addiction.
Any amount of money, whether it’s 20 bucks on a Keynote or $150 on a poker game, could have benefited any gambler more anywhere else. It simply is not worth the money because gambling encourages the vice of spending money for the sake of spending money, especially when you don’t have money to spend.
FOR THE FOUNDERS, THE COMMON GOOD CAME BEFORE LIBERTY
This game is perpetual clickbait for prideful people. Whether you’re betting on a horse, a play, or a game of cards, the risk is never worth the reward for one reason: The winnings confirm the fantasy that you can actually “win” in gambling overall. And it’s time to face the facts — you won’t.
So, instead of gambling, try girl math, and maybe you’ll end up on Wall Street.